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advice to aspiring performers

In light of this past weekend's cabaret performances, I thought I should compile the following brief list of advice for aspiring performers:
  1. Try to arrive at the theater more than 15 minutes before the show is scheduled to start and preferably not more than 45 minutes after call.

  2. It is preferable to warm up and stretch before you slip into costume.

  3. If you must dress before warming up, dealing with tight legs might be preferable to doing squats while wearing suit pants.

  4. Do not tear huge hole in pants mere minutes before the performance, especially if your choreography might involve revealing leg kicks.

  5. Do not wander into audience with ass exposed asking if anyone has a needle and thread.

  6. Do be sure to have a muffyjo on hand at every performance.

  7. While sitting in a chair with pants around ankles trying to thread a needle, do not allow fellow cast members to take pictures that might get posted all over the internet or be used as blackmail material. (I want the negatives, gilana!)

  8. Do be appreciative of all the awesome people who bring their wonderful talents and skills to each show.

Comments

( 6 comments — Leave a comment )
derspatchel
Dec. 5th, 2005 06:04 am (UTC)
What is it with you and pants?
spwebdesign
Dec. 5th, 2005 06:09 am (UTC)
Clearly, I must have a subconscious desire to display my assets around cast members!
gilana
Dec. 5th, 2005 02:36 pm (UTC)
Negatives? Honey, that was a digital camera. So, what will you give me not to post the picture on LJ? :)
dpolicar
Dec. 5th, 2005 05:26 pm (UTC)
The real question is, how many people will trump his offer?
You could get an auction going, here.
spwebdesign
Dec. 5th, 2005 05:39 pm (UTC)
There seems to be an assumption that I *don't* want this picture posted somewhere. I wonder what gave that impression….
muffyjo
Dec. 5th, 2005 03:39 pm (UTC)
{blush}
*hug*
Thank you.
( 6 comments — Leave a comment )

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